Mr. Right Now

Mercury Retrograde is upon us!!!…as it is several times a year. It’s always funny to see those that are abreast of the celestial movements go into a slight panic about this period. The most recent retrograde, which began on December 3rd, was allegedly unique in that it was ushered in with a supermoon. Interestingly enough, my wife and I were deep in an argument all that day, and I spent that night in a Kemetic yoga class and ritual, celebrating the event with an out of town guest we were hosting.
More relevant to the topic at hand, Mercury’s retrograde regurgitates old things, like old energy, habits, and most importantly people. Per most people’s reports of their experiences, exes, in particular, seem to always send the “Hey stranger…how’ve you been?” message under this celestial alignment. I’m no different. Well, maybe a little bit. I don’t physically reach out to my exes anymore. I just check on them where I can via social media and such, and send them good energy/ vibes. Hell, I check on them in general. I haven’t paid attention enough to notice if my checking up always occurs during retrograde.
This round of “retrograde ex round up” brought about an epiphany for me.
“They” say if you look hard enough, there’s a pattern in everything. I feel like the pattern that I noticed, in checking on my exes in this retrograde, is that they are much better off without me. Taking that “objective observation” a bit further, it seems like my presence in my exes lives helped catalyze that greatness. Now, before you jump down my throat about how incredibly egoic this sounds, let me put forth that in exploring this crazy thought for the sake of exploring, I realize that this could be a good or bad thing. In one hand, it could be that I was the catalyst that positively influenced my exes to chase after their wildest dreams due to the way that I live my life. Or, it could be that spending an extended amount of time with me is such a bad choice that people feel they’ve hit rock bottom and never want to be in “that place,” that allowed them to let me in their lives, again; causing them to reevaluate everything about themselves.
Regardless of which it is, if either, exploring the idea made me feel better about myself in that in some form or fashion, I have a place and purpose in the universe. After dealing with me, women move up in the world. So, I might not do well as “Mr. Right”, but the receipts show that I’m a damn good “Mr. Right Now.”

The Receipts:

T.H. – After leaving her for multiple reasons, she acquired her master’s degree, continues to vacation extravagantly within the U. S. and recently purchased her first home.
K.B. – After leaving me on Valentine’s day, she successfully finished her doctorate, and got married.
?.?. – After I left her because I was moving back home, she moved up in the world of Christian ministry, finished her master’s degree program and began chasing her dream of traveling the world as a travel nurse.
J. S. -After she left me, she joined t.he Order of the Eastern Star, found gainful employment, and is thriving.
K.Y. – After I left her in pursuit of polyamory, she obtained her master’s degree, fulfilled her dreams of traveling to several foreign countries and still traveling, and was promoted at her place of employment with a significant raise.
S.M. – After I left her due to incongruent values, she acquired a new job with a significant pay raise, more time off, and is engaged.
C.M.- After we mutually parted ways for a myriad of reasons, she was accepted and successfully matriculated through a prestigious culinary arts program.
L. C. – After I discontinued involvement due to what I felt was unfair treatment, she left Georgia and began traveling the world as an English teacher.
T.V. – After she left me due to what she felt like was a controlling relationship and incongruent values, she began chasing her dream as a traveling nurse. I’m sure more great things are on the horizon.

The idea was inspired, in part,  by a youtube video that I came across recently. The video talked about how “normality” was mostly characterized by the lack of courage to entertain and outwardly convey abstract thoughts, in an effort to fit in with the world around us. It was comforting to think of my innate ability and lack of filter as special. I also realized that this same “innate ability” and lack of filter is shared by the likes of Trump. So…yea. Thinking of myself as “Mr. Right Now”, no matter how crazy or egoic, is comforting to me, at the very least. The adage “whatever helps you sleep at night” is most appropriate here and  the audacity of it all reminds me of the movie “Good Luck Chuck.”

Also, don’t take this seriously. In coping with my brand of crazy, this is my exercising said crazy in what I believe to be the healthiest way.

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