For those of you who follow my site avidly you know that I only post about really good experiences, and really bad experiences. This past weekend I was blessed with the opportunity to waste my time and money at Frank Ski’s located in Atlanta, Ga. I usually make a long introduction and yada yada yada but this place pissed me off so much that I just want to get to the meat of it. First and foremost you must know that Frank Ski’s has a “dress code”. But it’s not your ordinary dress code. Oh no, they are too pretentious for an ordinary dress code. They have what I would like to call the “Rich Nigga” dress code. What does that mean Stephen? Well I’m glad you asked reader. Where as a true upscale restaurants would require their patrons to wear a dress coat maybe, or ban sneakers and jeans, Frank Ski’s requires that it’s patrons wear, what I call, “high end” nigga wear. There is a small print sign at the waiter’s desk detailing exactly what is and is not allowed. The best example of such and my favorite is the allowance of sneakers, but only “Designer Sneakers”. Yes, the sign actually says that. My lady made a great point when we read and laughed at said sign. “What if it’s knock off designer sneakers”. The rest of the dress code foolishness is more than I would like to dedicate any part of my life to talking about so it’s something that is best laughed at in person. I would go again just to take a picture of said small print sign, laugh, and leave. Frank Ski’s will never get another dime of mine. Let me elaborate on why.
I went with my girlfriend and her co-workers as a “Friday after work let your hair down” kind of deal. We were initially a party of 7. When everyone arrived, right before we were seated the waitress let us know that because we were a party of 7 that we had to spend at least $35/person per restaurant rules. I shit you not, I have 6 other witnesses to this foolishness. She didn’t say parties of 5 or more must spend $35 or more, she said WE had to spend at least $35 per person. This baffled us all and we spent the first 30 minutes or so of our visit trying to figure out how in THE FUCK the restaurant owner and operator thought that was okay to say/require of it’s patrons. But oh no my friend. This is far from the end of the fuckery.
So we get our food, and drinks and everything seems cool. The food was good, but nothing to call home to mom about, and the drinks were mixed well, a little on the strong side like I like it. Suddenly, one of the woman’s husband shows up and we make room for him to sit down. He grabs a chair from one of the many open tables in the immediate area and sits down. As soon as our waitress came over he ordered a drink and life is good. Until, some random employee comes over to tell him that he has to put the chair back. Now, the restaurant is busy but it is far from full. There were at least 10 open tables and no one waiting to be seated. So there is no real reason that this grown man should have to stand up as a paying patron at this restaurant, but that is how they prefer it. Not only do they remove his seat, they do not offer another seating solution at all. AT ALL! So they really want him to just be uncomfortable as he patronizes the business. If you are counting this is strike two.
Lastly, after the women squeezed in and made room for their co-workers husband and the forgiveness of alcohol has made everything okay, there came another,random employee, who I assumed to be the floor manager, to tell the entire table that there is a “two hour limit per seating, and that we were over our two hours”. I waited for her to crack a smile and give us a free dessert or drink, but this woman was stone serious. And she waited to make sure that we were situating ourselves to leave.
So let’s recap.
Strike One: Frank Ski’ requires apparently just parties of 7 to spend at least $35 per person. No real explanation given.
Strike Two: If you add a person to your party they can’t sit down, even if they are ordering.
Strike Three: There is a 2 hour limit per seating, even though you are required to spend $35 per person. You better hope they bring your food out in a hurry and eat fast, because talking to one another when you go out to an “upscale restaurant” in parties of 7+1 is not what you are supposed to do.
How retarded is this shit?!?!? The crazy part is that we had just lined our stomachs good and was about to order another round of drinks. We would have spent at least $70/ person in drinks alone. But no, Frank Ski is obviously a control freak that wants to follow as close as possible in “Justin’s” foot steps. I say let him. But if you are a friend of mine, don’t waste your time.
Instead go to “The Optimist” which I have already featured on this site. Same price range, kind of same area, no pretentiousness, and it is a true dining experience that will make you feel like you just had sex and got full some kind of way.
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